hellison: (Default)
hellison ([personal profile] hellison) wrote2005-12-22 11:02 am

(no subject)

At the risk of opening the can of messy worms that posts about rape always seem to, this quote this morning, tagged on the end of a brief news report just made me twitch -
The attack was condemned by local politicians who urged women to look out for each other during the current party season
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/4551200.stm

Because of course
a. You can't trust ANY men to look out for you
b. It's entirely the responsibility of women to make sure you're safe.

Yes, it is good that they are concerned, it is good advice in its way and yes, I may well be reading too much into it, but that's just how it struck me.
I'm not sure if it's the implication that you can't trust/rely on men or that it's all down to women too look out for each other because it's our responsibility to make sure we are safe, not men's responsibility to have some self control/respect for women that bothers me more.
Why aren't they urging men not to be rapists in the first place?

Hmm. I was going to say I've obviously been lucky with the men I know/have met, but surely it's not 'luck' that my male friends aren't rapists and that I can trust them fully? Surely that's NORMAL?

[identity profile] tyrell.livejournal.com 2005-12-22 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
Sorry, should have been clearer. Was answering the line "something aimed at men indicating they bear responsibility" (instead of only advertising to women).

Should have read: "Rapists know they bear the responsibility" for actions they took.

But yes, as a man who hangs around with entirely too many feminist groups, I do get sick of people assuming "all men have it in them" or "it's only ever men who rape, because they're built that way and women need protecting from them". Bollocks. Sexual and domestic abuse are *very common* but generalities never apply.

[identity profile] hellison.livejournal.com 2005-12-22 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
I do think the point needs to be made more often that rapist is NOT the default setting in men, and those that do commit rape aren't just 'being men', they're being criminals and the *exception*, in the same way that muggers, theives, murders etc are.