hellison | On Neil Gaiman (with photos!)

A New Rule of Life

No man should be allowed to go out in public being intelligent, witty, funny, artistic, creative, charming, self-deprecating, dishevelledly cute and attractive, having beautiful hands AND BE MARRIED.

Seriously. Some combinations of the above would be allowable, but all of them? SO NOT FAIR.

NB picture aren't fab because I was sitting right in front and so turned the flash off so I didn't blind the poor man (those of you subjected to my Flash From Hell before will understand this)

Met Alice for food after work, then we had a bit of time to kill, so went for a quick pint, which of course meant we arrived *just* before it all started meaning
a. there were very few seats left
b. no time to buy books before signing started

We ended up in the front row DIRECTLY OPPOSITE the stand. Right in front of him.
Btw, future organisers of such events should note that putting a man who dresses entirely in black right in front of a very white projector screen is not the best idea in the world. I was getting the most bizzare after-images and had to keep staring at the floor or anywhere else.
Not good :p

However, as you may have guessed, the man himself was great. He read first from Anansi Boys, and made what was amusing on paper hilarious when read out loud, despite his attempts at what I presumed as Jamican accents being woeful :p
Then he read the first chapter of the Mirrormask book, managing again to make it both laugh out loud funny and very touching in just the right places. After that there was a brief Q&A where most people asked obscure comic questions, but also we got the most long-winded (tho v. entertaining) version of 'Thursday' I've ever heard in reply to 'when will good omens 2 be done?'
Seriously, I was so close to just shouting THURSDAY when he was half way thro [1] but I restrained myself ;p I very much wanted to ask a question about his blog and if he finds it odd that thousands of complete strangers know the basic details of his day to day life (like did you find your socks ok? and did you keep that kitten?) but I'd just about got up the nerve to put up the hand when he said 'last question'. So it will have to wait til next time.

He did say lots of witty and amusingly quotable stuff that I was determined to remember and repeat but of course I can't. I do tho have the best answer ever to what he thought of academia and creative writing classes which was (slightly paraphrased)
I never took them when I was young because I was arrogant and I just wanted to write and I figured writing classes were just a load of wank
Yep, he said 'load of wank'. (DAMNWHYISHEMARRIED?).
Also, the 'region 1' dvd version of Neverwhere on Amazon, and elsewhere, is actually Region 0 so you can buy it and it will work here, yay ;)

Then the signing! Queueing for ages only served to increase the OMG WHAT DO I SAY? panic, but in the end, it was great. Well. for a very small value of great. Conversation went like so (yes i'll do this word for word because I don't want to forget it later!) ...

NG Hi! How are you?
Me Great thanks! How are you? Glad its the last night of the tour?
NG Yes, very much, but it's nice to finish somewhere I've never been before
ME Do you get to see much of any of the cities you visit?
NG Well, not this time, it was dark when we arrived, we went straight from the hotel to the BBC to here, so I've seen nothing
NG *signs books all interestingly, gets to Good Omens*
Me I'd hoped to get Terry to sign that too, but he had to cancel the signing
NG Yes, I heard he was taken ill or something?
Me yeah, he had to go have an angioplasty, but it all turned out ok
(me inwardly OMFG I'M DISCUSSING TP WITH NG LIKE WE ALL KNOW EACH OTHER OR SOMETHING)
NG well I'm sure he'll be back!
*signs*
Alice * waves camera* do you want a picture now?
Me is that ok? (yes despite having seen many others do it, I still had to ask ;p)
NG Of course, come round to this side of the table, beside me
Me *OMGOMGOMG DIES OMGOMG*
NG say when you want me to look up *signs*
Alice say when!
Me um, you have the camera, you say when!
NG yep, you say when
Alice When!
Pictures *are taken* (see below)
Me thanks! *collects books*
Alice there, I took pictures, do you love me now?
NG *laughs*
Me (to alice) yes, I love you! (turning to NG) I love you too!
NG *waves gracefully to the crazy lady*
ME *realising what i just said* OK RUN TO THE PUB RUN

So we ran. He is lovely. And charming, and ... yeah FANGIRL.

And now I want to stalk him all around the world...

ANYWAY then we went to the pub and I texted lots of people and drank pints and... OMG I WANT TO STALK HIM FOREVER

And now, pictures! Didn't take too many cos I was sitting directly in front of him and didn't want to spend the entire evening waving a camera in his face ;p

reading from mirrormask

Q&A

Ultimate Fangirl Moment 'shouldn't *she* say when?

'Where am I again?'

Alice, avoiding publicity

[1]For the non-mudders (hi!) This is a running joke in answer to the constant question of 'when will X be in game?' to which the answer is almost always 'THURSDAY' *pause for cries of OMG REALLY?* followed by 'but I didn't say WHICH THURSDAY' at which point hilarity ensues and we all either Laugh Out Loud or Roll About (on the) Floor Laughing. Good times...