hellison | Yes, I AM this bored

stalkery meme thingy, nicked from

vashti.
Can I just add, SCARILY accurate stalkery meme thing *hides under the desk*

Stalking is illegal. hellison confronts thesme_01.

thesme_01 is stalking hellison
thesme_01’s REAL name :	Fogg Webbe
thesme_01’s REAL DOB :	12th September 1978
Height :163 cm	Weight : 93.0 kg
thesme_01 has dreamt about you :	17 times
thesme_01 became interested in you :	01st June 2003
thesme_01’s latest dream about you
You and thesme_01 are in a bar. thesme_01 carries you up onto the pool table and begins undressing you. thesme_01 starts to whip you around the ass with your own jeans.
This is how thesme_01 describes your relationship behind your back
‘It’s all gone to shit. I can’t be without her. Tonight’s the night that I end it all. Where the fuck did I put the shotgun?’
thesme_01’s been stealing stuff from your house too.
thesme_01 has stolen all of your baby-photos.
They’ve even started modifying their body for you
thesme_01 is considering having reconstructive surgery on their earlobes so that they are similar in appearance to your own.
They sent the following message to you in a Valentines
The world cannot take away what we have. We are destined to be two lovebirds entwined eternally in our love for one another. To cut the crap, do you fancy a fuck?

The Police
No. calls to the police :	27 times
Your Last Call to The Police
"Police? Look that fucker thesme_01 is still harassing me. I got another valentines card smeared in blood today again. Can’t you do something about this? I’m starting to become scared for my life."
thesme_01’s Police File
thesme_01 would be a nothing more than a loveable rogue if it were not for their love of samurai swords.

Testimonies about thesme_01

mirrorshard - Marathon Munt

‘Dear God! I knew thesme_01 was a right thieving bastard but I didn’t know they were such a skank. hellison is a bit of a sucker really.’

heliotic - Flaccid Pornstar

‘Ahhh none of this is new to me. hellison’s been telling me about thesme_01’s antics for ages now. I don’t honestly know why it has put up with it for so long.’

sleetersoulfire - A withered old hag

‘All of this is incredibly funny. It goes to show how deluded hellison really is. I just wish it’d quit the act now and again. It grows a bit tiresome after a while.’