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[personal profile] hellison
For [livejournal.com profile] being_here, who is Poorly and needs cheering up...

Once upon a time, not so long ago, I went to work an on excavation in a village near Sligo (a story in itself with the Disco Bus, Mr Perry Who Owned Everything and the pub that stopped for Fr. Ted).

We were excavating the drawbridge pit of a C14th castle, prior to restoration works and eventual opening to the public.
The land had been originally owned by a convent and at some point the nuns had handed the bit with the castle on over to the OPW (mexican equivalent of the DOE), while they still lived next door.

There were 4 of us on the dig - myself & C, the director, also convent educated, and the 2 lads, P, a staunch northern Presbyterian and R. a D4 prod, CofI possibly... anyway, neither of them had ever had any real contact with nuns and couldn't understand why C & myself were so twitchy about them [1].

Occasionally while we were working, one would wander up and ask the usual questions about what we were doing, what had we found etc, as people do.

One day C. was standing out on the front wall, drawing the cobbles or something equally fascinating, when an ancient little nun - with veil, so obviously too old to even consider stealth-nunning - hobbled up and asked how it was going, had we found any gold yet (stabworthy in itself) and as C. launched into the usual spiel suddenly interrupted with

"God forgive give me but I've often wished the IRA would come and blow this fecking thing up!"

C. rather derailed from her spiel, stared, while she continued
"Fecking Anglo-Normans, coming and building fecking castles on OUR land! Should be blown to smithereens! Anyway, good luck to ye now! Cheerio!".
And off she hobbled again, leaving C. to come running into the rest of, white of face and babbling "The nuns! The nuns want to blow up the castle!".

Thus proving that not only are nuns Evil, they really do know how to hold a grudge.


[1] Especially since they were the new STEALTH nuns who went about without veils on so they could sneak up behind you in shop queues and you WOULDN'T KNOW until you got a good look at the hair (always a giveaway) and shoes. And then it could be too late.

Date: 2007-11-12 05:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adelpha.livejournal.com
Nuns with no wimple? Scanadlous! Don't they realise they could get pregnant?!? [1]


[1] Well it's only happened once in their marketing literature, but it doesn't mean it won't happen again...

Date: 2007-11-12 05:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hellison.livejournal.com
At some point in the 80s they were allowed to dewimple AND go back to their own names!

Which was a bit confusing because we went from some rather exotic nun-names - Bonaventure, Benignous, Benedict, Pious, Hyacinth (I always wanted to ask how she got away with that one) to a host of Eileens.

The stealth nunning was very freaky tho. They looked almost like NORMAL people! They could be ANYWHERE. LURKING.

Date: 2007-11-12 05:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adelpha.livejournal.com
How did they end up with their Nun Names anyway? Take their mother's maiden name and the name of the street they grew up on?

Date: 2007-11-12 05:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hellison.livejournal.com
I think they may have pulled them out of a hat. Or wimple :p

Or perhaps had them assigned by a particularly vindictive priest...

Date: 2007-11-12 07:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adelpha.livejournal.com
Ooh, Nun v. Priest tag-team - who would win?

Or Nun v. Chuck Norris?

Date: 2007-11-12 07:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hellison.livejournal.com
Nuns v. Priests, DEFINITELY nuns. Have you not seen fr. ted?


Nun v. chuck norris? Harder. But I reckon any nun worth her wimple would have him lifted by the sideburns to the front of the class before he could get a foot off the ground ;p

Date: 2007-11-12 07:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adelpha.livejournal.com
They're that bad, but let a priest give them such interesting names? :P

Date: 2007-11-12 11:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_unhurt_/
Nun v. chuck norris? Harder. But I reckon any nun worth her wimple would have him lifted by the sideburns to the front of the class before he could get a foot off the ground

this image now burnt into my brain!

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